“I think Kimonos are really beautiful and they really suit me. As a child I thought I was Chinese in a previous life, I was the designer of a sewer system. I had never read books about China. As a child they often asked me where I came from, I always answered that I used to be a Chinese and therefore have these eyes. “


info
×

Dark circles around Ian's eyes show Ian's lack of sleep.


info
×

“He was different from the start, he was first examined when he was 9 months old because he was not sleeping, he only slept when he sat with me and responded very intensely to everything. He was not a baby, he wanted to sit ... he was a little director. "Tells Tamara, Ian's mother. Ian is autistic.

After years of constantly changing schools and the disgraceful treatment of her child (Ian was locked up in one of the schools and beaten) Tamara kept Ian home where she taught him from the age of twelve. Eventually they were exempted at the age of thirteen.

Across the Netherlands, around 15,000 children, who need special education such as children with autism, are forced to stay at home because there is no good place for them.

Ian and Tamara don't have it easy. Ian’s intelligence has been and continues to be doubted, which is completely unjustified but which causes many problems. Authorities therefore want to force help and, according to them, he should live in a residential group. But Ian doesn't want to be in a living group at all, he wants to stay at home with his mother.

In addition, a police officer, who never spoke to Tamara and Ian personally, made a false report to Veilig Thuis (Advice and Reporting Center for Domestic Violence and Child Abuse) at the direction of a neighbor with psychological problems. That report has never been withdrawn, so they are now known as a family that needs help. This gives both Ian and his mother a lot of stress so far. This report is incorrectly contained in a file that continues to exist. Because of this they have to explain every time that nothing is wrong.

Ian turned 21 last December.

Ian and Tamara have been living on the cozy but small and old floor in Amsterdam Oud West for almost fifteen years now with lots of books, clothing and art.

However, there are far too many incentives here that make Ian almost sleepless and chronically tired. Involvement of incomprehensible neighbors causes a lot of extra stress. The result is that Ian rarely comes out. Sometimes not for months at a time.

The forty-seven square meter is literally his world. But not a safe world. The sound that the many neighbors produce (intentionally or not) continuously penetrates the home.

There is no view of another property.

It is also financially difficult, Tamara is cut on her benefit because Ian is 21. It is expected that if you are 21 you have your own income and can therefore provide for your own maintenance. Which is therefore not realistic.

For half a year I met Ian every two weeks to portray him. In the small apartment that is literally his world we worked together on a series of portraits. Because Ian is a special appearance with a very authentic and own sense of clothing and style, I asked him to think about what he wanted to look like before every shoot. A creative collaboration to show what his life looks like.


Because Ian does not have enough energy for things he prefers to do, he games a lot. That takes little effort. For the photo we waited until he was really in the game. Moving his feet with what happened on the screen.


info
×

"Shall I look outside through the window?" I said that of course it was okay if he liked to look outside. "I actually never look outside, but I thought it was fun for the photo."


info
×

When a neighbor came down the stairs, Ian stuck himself startled against the wall.


info
×

Mother and son are two of a kind and take good care of each other. Ian likes to cook for himself and his mother. His latest creation was pasta with rice, beans with tomato sauce and fried egg. An interesting but surprisingly tasty combination according to the two.

info
×

“Many people ask if I am a rock star because of my clothes and long hair. I often speak English with my mother. "

“I really like my long hair, it's just me. I also like it because it makes me feel more feminine. I preferred being man and woman at the same time, just like the son of the Greek god Hermes. ”

info
×

If the noise from outside becomes too much for him, Ian prefers to hide under his duvet to shut himself off from the world. That doesn't really help either, but at least gives him the feeling that he is doing something about it.

info
×

Ian also does not leave the house very often because he cannot dress the way he wants to, people would react on that and ask him questions. Whether they are vintage tracksuits or dresses, he wears it with conviction and flair.


info
×

The table is in the middle of the house as a sort of partition. At the back Ian has his own living room next to his bedroom. There are also the kitchen and the shower. They hardly ever sit at the table. If he had enough energy they would probably play board games, Ian thinks.


info
×

The answer to the question how he is doing is actually always the same. "Tired." When I ask him what he did this week, the answer is "trying to rest."

In the unlikely case they would ever get another house and he was totally rested and therefore had energy, Ian would love to become a designer. With the money he is going to earn with that, he will help people. Especially children who are in a similar situation to himself.

He would still enjoy living together with his mother, but much more spacious with a large shared space and a spacious private place for both.


info
×

Ian sleeps in a mermaid tail. Usually not under the covers because he is often too hot. The window is always 

open and the heating always off. Even in the winter.


info
×
Using Format